


I Told You So

by Fantasy_Fanatic03



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: I know it is cliche, Like I said. This is a vent fic, Magic Reveal, Merlin gets shot by an arrow, Merlin is like their little brother, Nightmares, No beta reader, Panic Attacks, Poor Merlin, Protective Arthur, Protective Knights, Temporary Character Death, basically...a vent fic, but only temporary, i tried to make this as accurate as possible
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-11
Updated: 2020-07-16
Packaged: 2021-03-04 05:27:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,390
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24668362
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fantasy_Fanatic03/pseuds/Fantasy_Fanatic03
Summary: On a routine patrol, Merlin is shot by an arrow. It is up to Arthur and the knights to race against the clock to get Merlin back to Camelot.UPDATE: 07-23-2020The Sequel is up.
Relationships: Arthur Pendragon - Relationship, Gaius - Relationship, Guinevere - Relationship, Merlin - Relationship
Comments: 3
Kudos: 106





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Note: As per usual. Doing anything and everything I can to ensure the characters go through something terrible….Not really. Just another vent fic…It’s my only way to cope...leave me alone *(hisses and hides in the dark corner with a fluffy blanket and pillow)*
> 
> Also, I did try to make this as accurate as possible with the wound and time era. Constructive criticism is welcome with open arms. Please...I’m in doubt and I really need it...

______________________________________________________________________________

I went as fast as I could to Arthur’s chambers. I was most definitely late. Gaius is out on a trip to a village in Camelot due to some form of sickness. I had overslept, having stayed up until the early hours of the morning polishing the prat’s armor, something I had neglected to do the day before. 

I woke the king. “Sorry, we’re a bit behind schedule, now let’s have you, Lazy Daisy!” I said, pulling Arthur from the bed. Arthur grumbled as we went on with our morning routine. 

“I need you to polish my armor and sharpen my sword. I’ve got a training session with the knights today, also-”

I tuned Arthur out. I already knew what needed to be done. So, as Arthur listed off the chores for the day, I worked on tidying up the room. 

“-and tomorrow, we’re going on a routine patrol-  _ Merlin _ , are you even listening?” Arthur asked.

“Yes,  _ sire _ ,” I replied sarcastically. 

“Polish your armor, sharpen your sword, clean your room, do your laundry, and get stuff ready for a routine patrol tomorrow,” I said as if the words were rehearsed in my mind a million times. Which wasn’t far off from the truth. 

I hated going on patrols and hunting trips, they always went wrong. Whether it be bandits or some random sorcerer hell-bent of revenge. I went on to do what was asked of me, only stopping to get Arthur ready for the training session. 

After Arthur dismissed me, I headed off to finish the rest of the horridly long list of chores before the patrol tomorrow morning. 

*Time skip- in the evening*

After getting finishing chores for Arthur, I finally was able to lie down. I felt exhausted. Running after Arthur, protecting him, doing chores for him, coming in and doing stuff for Gaius, then finally getting some rest. Well, sometimes. 

“Oh good! Now that you’ve been resting, I can have you go out and gather some herbs for me.” 

Gaius was back. “But I-”

“No buts, Merlin,” Gaius said. 

Great. Another thing I have to do. He told me what herbs he needed and sent me on my way. 

It went rather smoothly, though I was absolutely exhausted by the time I got back to the castle. Thankfully, Gaius had told Arthur of my whereabouts, so I could go straight to bed. 

I fell asleep in my day clothes. 

_ “Merlin. You are accused of practicing sorcery. That crime is punishable by death according to the law. I, Arthur Pendragon, king of Camelot, hereby sentence you to the pyre.” _

_ Merlin’s heart dropped. This was not how it was supposed to happen. “Arthur, I-” _

_ “Silence, Sorcerer! The verdict has been made! I will no longer listen to your petty lies.” _

_ Merlin hung his head low. “I only use it for you…” he pleaded. “Please…” _

_... _

_ Fire. White-hot fire made it’s way up Merlin’s clothes. Merlin looked up at Arthur once more, the king’s eyes were colder than stone. He allowed his eyes to drift towards Gwen. Though not nearly as cold as her husband, her eyes too, held a dark bitterness. Then, his vision was clouded by black smoke that entered his lungs, he coughed and gagged. Merlin let loose a scream of anguish and pain that he’d been holding in.  _

_ Sizzling tears made their way down his face. The flames were licking at his legs, slowly making their way up his body.  _

_ Breathing was impossible.  _

_ “Merlin! Wake up!” _

I shot up into a sitting position. I couldn’t breathe. Gaius was standing over me with a horribly worried expression on his face. “It’s alright, my boy. It was just a dream,” he said. 

I tried breathing deeply. I could still feel the flames on my body. Smell the smoke that suffocated me. Once I finally calmed down, Gauis spoke. “What was it about this time?” he asked softly. 

“I don’t want to talk about it…” I really didn’t. Gaius must have sensed it because he left me alone after that. It felt like ages before the sun rose the next morning. I got out of bed. 

Getting Arthur and Gwen their breakfast was a chore. Everything that came easy and I found...almost fun to do, was becoming boring. I could barely bring myself to do them anymore. All my body wanted to do was sleep, but my brain didn’t seem to get the memo. 

Once I successfully made sure Arthur got out of bed and brought them their breakfast, I began preparing for the patrol. 

*Time skip-in the forest, late afternoon*

“Arthur, I think-”

“Oh for God’s sake,  _ Mer _ lin. Another one of your funny feelings again?” Arthur questioned. 

“Yes, and if you would care to be observant every once and a while-”

“Oh stop being such a girl’s petticoat,” Arthur teased. “It’s just a routine patrol, nothing is going to happen."

Of course, something bad  _ did _ happen. Right after those words had left Arthur’s lips, a shout came from the treeline and about fifteen bandits ran out from the shadows. The knights were thrown into a battle. Merlin did what he did best, making sure none of them got hurt from the protective shadows of the trees. 

The sounds of metal against metal, shouts, and angry grunts could have been heard for miles in the quiet forests. 

Soon, the battle was won. The bandits began to flee from the knights. Arthur and Merlin locked eyes, both wanting to make sure that each other was safe. Arthur's face morphed to one of shock and worry. "Merlin! Look out!" Arthur yelled. But, it was in vain. Merlin began turning, when a horrible pain exploded in his chest. 

Gwaine slashed at the bandit, killing him in one blow. Merlin had yet to fall. The warlock swayed on the spot, looking down at the arrow protruding from his chest and back to Arthur's frightened expression before he finally fell, eyes rolling back into his head. Despite Arthur not being the closest to the young warlock, he got to him mere seconds before his head hit the ground. 

Soft whimpers emitted from Merlin. His breaths were shallow and blood was seeping from the wound. Merlin stirred and groaned in pain when Arthur moved his hands around the arrow. 

"Hang on Merlin. You'll be fine." Arthur's voice shook. "I"m gonna have to pull it out," he warned. The sound of cloth ripping reached his ears. 

"Dang...it...something else I'm gonna have to fix…" Merlin spoke breathlessly. It was a shock he was even conscious. Once Merlin's shirt was off, they were able to get a better look at the wound. It was spitting out blood and was already starting to bruise around the edges. 

"Don't talk, you idiot."

Arthur braced himself and Merlin to the best of his abilities before pulling the arrow from the wound. Merlin let loose a yell of pain, not able to hold back anymore. 

They Bound the wound as tightly as possible. Merlin's eyes began to droop, exhaustion from the pain setting in. "Don't you dare fall asleep, clotpole."

"That's...my word," Merlin's voice was barely a whisper. 

It was a race against the clock. Despite their attempts to keep Merlin awake, he was slipping fast. 

"Sire, it is becoming too dark to see. We are going to have to make camp tonight," Leon said. 

Arthur looked down at Merlin, sitting up against his chest. Riding hadn't been the best option, but it was the only one. Arthur refused to let him out of his arms. " 

In the end, they were forced to make camp, even if they were just a hair's breadth from the gates of Camelot."We leave at first light for Camelot," Arthur said.

Merlin was laid close by the fire, on Arthur's bedroll. His breathing had yet to improve. His face was ashen and wan.

Arthur just hoped they wouldn't be too late. Despite all he said, and how much he refused to outwardly admit it, Merlin was his best friend. About the only person he could truly trust. Arthur feared if he lost Merlin...he'd lose everything. 

It was a long night, watching Merlin, making sure he kept breathing. They changed his bandages. The wound still bleeding, but not as bad. Merlin had lost a lot of blood. 

It was finally morning. Merlin did not improve, he became worse with as the hours passed. Now, burning with a fever, they had to move even faster. once the gates came into view, it gave Arthur more will power, knowing that Merlin would get help as soon as they got to Gaius. 

People stared as the king rode in with his servant. It was something that wasn't known throughout the land. 

Gwen rushed to meet them when she saw Merlin. "Oh God! What happened?" She asked. Gaius not far behind her. 

"Bring him to my chambers. It seems we have little time."

Gaius got started immediately. He took Merlin's wrist, feeling for a pulse. It was weak and unsteady, but there. his breathing was wheezy and extremely shallow. 

"G-Gaius…?" Came Merlin's voice. "It 'urts…" the dark-haired warlock whimpered. His voice was slurred from pain and blood loss. 

"I know, my boy." 

Merlin went limp. His eyes closed, chest stopped rising and falling. 

_____________________________________________________________________________

Merlin looked around. The place he was in was cold. Suddenly, there was a bright light. It was warm and welcoming. "My son." 

Merlin turned around "Father?" 

"Yes. Merlin, you must go back to Arthur...your destiny is not yet finished."

"How?" 

"You are magic, my son. You just have to believe," Balinor said. 

Believe Merlin did. He found himself waking up to commotion, Gwen crying. Arthur sounding pained. Gaius, Gaius sounding utterly downhearted. Then the pain hit. "Oww," he groaned out. 

"Merlin?" Arthur's voice held hope. Merlin took a breath as deep as the pain would let him. 

Gaius reached out for his wrist, checking his pulse. Weak, but steady and getting stronger. Merlin felt his Magic flowing through his veins, trying to heal him. He fell into a fitful slumber. 

____________________________________________________________________________

"How is he, Gaius?" Arthur asked as he came in for the fifth time that evening.

"Same as he was last time you asked Sire, though I'm delighted to admit he is getting stronger."

"It's a miracle. I could have sworn he'd be gone forever."

Gaius smiled. "It certainly is, Sire."

Arthur walked into Merlin’s room, something he’d done every night since they brought Merlin back, three nights ago. “Merlin!” Arthur exclaimed delightedly when he noticed the latter awake. “How are you feeling?” 

“I’m fine.”

Arthur gave him a look. “ _ Mer _ lin.”

“Really, Arthur. I feel fine right now,” Merlin said. The dark-haired warlock seemed to be contemplating saying something else. 

“Come on, out with it.”

“I hate to say this,  _ Sire _ , but-”

“I swear if you say ‘I told you so…” Arthur threatened. Merlin knew it was an empty threat. 

“I told you so.”

Merlin smiled as Arthur playfully but gently cuffed his head. “Clotpole.”

“Idiot.”

Merlin was going to be fine. It was an unwritten rule to protect Merlin at all costs. 


	2. Chapter Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry that it is kind of cliche...I hope you enjoy it.

On the fourth day after the hunting accident, Merlin developed a fever. ‘Just a mild sickness.” The physician had stated. His body was overworked with trying to cure itself and now on top of a fever. 

“How is he, Gaius?” Arthur asked. The old physician was currently placing a cold washcloth on Merlin’s burning forehead. 

“I’m having trouble keeping his fever down, Sire.” Gaius’ tone was soft and filled with concern. Once the washcloth was replaced, Gaius carefully unwrapped the bandage and began cleaning the wound. “I have to go get my rounds done, would you mind staying here with him, Sire?” 

Merlin stirred, opening his fever clouded, blue eyes. They rolled around sluggishly until finally landing on Arthur. “Ar’ur?” His voice was slurred with sleep. 

“I’m here. Go back to sleep,” Arthur said as he took the now warm washcloth from Merlin’s forehead and soaked it in the cool water before replacing it back on Merlin’s head. 

“M’kay,” the dark-haired warlock mumbled sleepily, closing his eyes and going back into a seemingly restless slumber. 

When Gaius returned, Arthur left. He was a king with meetings and other stuff that needed to be done no matter what. Gwen visited Merlin as often as she could and so did the knights. 

______________________________________________________________________________

Merlin’s fever broke on the sixth day. He was conscious and lucid, but still in pain. Arrow wounds were not exactly the most comfortable thing in the world. Now that Merlin was feeling better, he was insisting he get back to work. He was limited to only very small tasks. He, per Gaius’ orders, was not allowed to do any heavy lifting, no leaving without someone capable of helping him, not a single thing that could end up with him back in critical condition. 

However, getting Merlin to stay in one spot and away from the king was an entirely different story. Almost impossible in Gaius’ book. You would think, keeping the injured servant/warlock away from Arthur would be easy. Truth be told, it was harder than controlling a dragon. 

“But  _ Gaius _ !” Merlin whined. “I’m  _ bored _ .” 

“Merlin,” Gaius said in his warning tone. 

“Gaius is right, Merlin,” Gwen said when she walked in. 

Merlin slumped over in the chair he was sitting in, feeling defeated. “I can’t just sit here twiddling my thumbs all day,” Merlin mumbled. 

“Gwen, would you mind staying with him while I go on my rounds?” 

Gwen smiled her signature smile and nodded. After Gaius left, Gwen sat down in front of Merlin. 

"Are you okay, Merlin?" Gwen questioned softly 

"Fine, Gwen." 

"You can talk to me."

"It's just, everyone treats me like I'm glass. I'm not going to just keel over and die if I go out anywhere." 

Gwen gave a soft sigh, somewhat startled by what he said. "I understand. But I think you also need to understand that we aren't doing it to annoy you. You  _ died _ Merlin." Gwen's voice trembled and looked him in the eyes. "You were  _ dead _ ."

Tears began to fall from her eyes. "It was so scary...and Arthur...he was devastated," she said. Merlin frowned. It wasn't like he  _ meant _ to die. It just kinda happened. 

"I'm sorry," he said. "Please don't cry."

She sniffed, wiping away the loose tears. “I’m just glad you’re alright. We all are.”

“That we are,” came another voice from right outside the door. Gwaine, Leon, Elyan, Percival, and finally Arthur came through the door. “We’re here to rescue you,” Gwaine said. 

“That’s too bad. I’m not allowed to go anywhere,” Merlin said. 

“Well,” Percival started. 

“We might have talked to Gaius,” said Elyan.

“Nothing more than just a walk around the castle,” Arthur said with that tint of worry that took over his voice for the past six days.

“Just to get you out of this stuffy room,” Gwen added. 

Merlin beamed at them. He truly was tired of being cooped up with nowhere to go, and as much as he complained about his job, he missed it. 

______________________________________________________________________________

It wasn’t a very long walk, but at least he was able to get out of the boring chambers. Merlin had to admit that when he got back to his bed, he was exhausted. His talk with Gwen and walk with the others was enlightening. He  _ knew _ they weren't being over-protective mother Hensley just to annoy him. He  _ knew _ that he was really dead for several moments. He  _ knew _ he scared them all. But it wasn't like it was his fault. 

He fell asleep with his thoughts, too tired to stay awake much longer. 

*time skip-later that evening*

_ The fire was back. Burning every inch of his body. The flames licking at his clothes, melting his skin. Painful screams emitted from the young warlock. His lungs protested madly, trying to rid them of the horrible smoke entering them through his nose and mouth. He coughed so hard he gagged, wanting nothing more than to just curl up. His head was pounding. It was as if someone were taking a hammer relentlessly to his head. His bones ached, skin burned.  _

_ Tears sizzled from his eyes. He was engulfed in the flames, no way to get out. No one was coming to save him...  _

Merlin woke with a start. Heart racing, breaths coming in rapid gasps. It took him several minutes to calm down. That was the dream he had been having lately Most of the time, whilst the same dream, it always seemed...different somehow. All he knew though, was that if he were to die, he would not want to burn. He wouldn’t wish it on anyone. Burning by pyre was the absolute worst way to die. 

Merlin did not sleep for the rest of the night. Too afraid that he’d be put through the same nightmare. 

*time skip*

Arthur whistled as he walked down the halls to the physician's chambers. Despite his duty as king, he visited Merlin as much as he could. Though, he would never admit how much he cared for Merlin. Truth be told, he was the only person Arthur could trust. The only person Arthur could call best friend.    
  


There was something about Merlin that Arthur couldn’t quite fathom out. He acted a fool most of the time a clumsy, idiotic fool. But...there was a wiseness about him, one that Arthur didn’t quite understand. Despite the fact that Merlin was an open book, he was mysterious and guarded. 

Arthur knocked on the door and was let in by Gaius. Merlin was sitting at the table, poking at a bowl of porridge, looking wan and bleary-eyed.

Merlin's eyes snapped up when Arthur walked in. “Good to see you up and about, Merlin,” Arthur said truthfully. Almost a week ago, Arthur did not think he’d be saying these words. But, he was oh, so thankful that he was. It was terrifying, to almost lose someone so precious as Merlin was. 

“If only I could get back to work,” the young warlock sent a mild glare Gaius’ way. 

“You and I both know that you aren’t ready for that,” Gaius said sternly. 

“But  _ Gaius _ ,” Merlin whined. “I’m bored just sitting here all day.”

“Gaius is right, Merlin. You’re in no shape to. Just focus on getting rest and healing up.” Arthur stood from his spot, heading for the door, “I’ve got stuff to do.”

With that, he left. 

___________________________________________________________________________

**Time skip**

It was three weeks after the patrol. Merlin was back to work. He was feeling more like himself and Gaius cleared him to go back to work with limited tasks that required little heavy lifting. Gaius just wanted to be safe. All was going well.

Like anything could go well in Camelot for a while. Merlin was beginning to think that things were going too smoothly. 

Of course, there was another sorcerer hell-bent on revenge. Of course, it would have to be right in the middle of a high council meeting. 

The sorcerer stood in the middle of the room, pointing a glare in Arthur’s direction. 

No. It wasn’t as if Merlin was given the choice to tell Arthur. Not at all. His secret just  _ had _ to be forcefully ripped from him due to unforeseen circumstances. 

“You, Arthur Pendragon, have caused so much pain and misery to my kind. And now you will pay the price!” 

“I cannot let you harm the king.” Merlin stepped out from his position. 

“Merlin, what are you doing?” Arthur asked incredulously. 

The sorcerer muttered a spell and suddenly, fire-bolts were making haste towards the council and the king. 

Merlin’s sad expression confused the king, though before he dwelled too much on what it meant, there was a large golden shield and a flash of transparent blue eyes turning to gold. “I’m sorry….please don’t hate me.”

“You, Emrys have betrayed your own kin!” The sorcerer yelled with anger. “You protect the Pendragons even after all they have done!?”

“You will not harm them. I’m sorry, I can’t let you do that.”

It didn’t take long before the sorcerer was fleeing despite the raw anger and vengefulness that resided in him.

It was clear to Arthur that Merlin was terrified. However, the sting of betrayal from none other than his best friend and little brother hit hard. 

“Guards! Arrest him.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WHOOHOO IT'S FINALLY OUT! I hope you enjoy this chapter.

“Guards! Arrest him.” Were the words that Merlin never wanted to hear. The warlock fell to his knees. 

“Arthur, please...please I only use it for you!” His voice trembled. His body shaking like an earthquake. Merlin was grabbed by the upper arms. Arthur, I-”

“I won’t hear of it,  _ Sorcerer _ ,” Arthur spat out.

Merlin slumped in their grasp, knowing there was no use in fighting. His eyes met Gwen’s. “I’m sorry..,” he whispered one last time before he was taken to the dungeons. 

Merlin was thrown, not so carefully, into a cell. He curled up as tight as his lanky body would allow and tried not to cry. It wasn’t the pain from being gripped harshly or from being thrown, but the emotional pain from the guilt and sadness he carried. 

It was never his intention to hurt Arthur. Never. But it wasn’t like he could help having magic. It was something he had been doing since he was a wee baby. Nothing could stop him from using it. 

Footsteps resounded through the empty corridors and dread pooled in the pit of Merlin’s stomach. He stayed in his form, curled up, shaking uncontrollably. He knew it was going to be a scary experience when Arthur found out. But the reality was worse than the nightmares. In the nightmares, all Merlin had to do was wake up. But...what could he do now that it was real? 

The blonde king stood in front of Merlin’s cell. His face was stone cold and almost expressionless. That’s what scared Merlin, he wanted Arthur to yell. He wanted him to be angry. That he could deal with...but this stone-cold, expressionless Arthur...he couldn’t deal with. 

Merlin was the first to speak. “A-Arthur I-”

“I do not want to hear your petty excuses! Do not speak my name” Arthur yelled. “I can’t believe this. What did you think was going to happen? You think I’m that stupid!? You just thought that you could get close to me so you could take over the castle, didn’t you?” 

“No, I never wanted anything but to protect you! You’re my friend!”

“I could never be friends with a  _ sorcerer _ ,” Arthur spat out. 

That was it. That was the final straw before Merlin’s heart shattered into a million pieces. Tears welled up in his transparent blue eyes. “I never wanted you to find out this way! Sire, I was born with magic! It’s not something I can help!” 

“I won’t listen to your lies. You have been accused of sorcery which is punishable by death.”

Merlin was on the verge of hyperventilation. His throat constricted and his chest felt like there was a metal band squeezing far too tight. “P-please… just listen to me…” he begged one last time. 

His pleas fell on deaf ears. The poor warlock was shaking out of his skin and tears began rolling incessantly down his face. “Judgement will be passed tomorrow.” Was all the mighty king said before he left. 

Merlin finally broke down into tears. “I’m sorry…” Merlin whispered to no one. It was like a mantra in his head. ‘I’m sorry’ was repeated over and over again. The warlock didn’t move from where he was laying on the cold floor. 

______________________________________________________________________________

Arthur felt angry. Angry at himself for getting close to someone. Angry at Merlin for having magic. Angry that he didn’t see it. His closest friend and unofficial adviser...had magic...betrayed him. 

But, then again, this was Merlin they were talking about. Merlin, the clumsy, bumbling fool. Merlin who was his best friend. Keyword... _ was. _ Arthur didn’t know what to think. 

The blond king was so caught up in his thoughts that he bumped into Gaius. “Sire! I regret that I was unable to attend the council meeting. How did it go? Where’s Merlin?”

“ _ Merlin _ is a sorcerer. Did you know? Did you know that you were harboring a  _ sorcerer _ ?” Arthur asked. Judging by Gaius’ face, the old physician did. 

“Sire, permission to speak freely?”

“Granted.” Arthur ground out. 

“Sire, Merlin is not a sorcerer,-”

“He is! I saw him!”

“No, Sire. Let me finish. Merlin is a warlock. He was born with his power. Merlin has been using magic since he was born.”

Arthur was conflicted. There was no way he could  _ hate _ Merlin. His mind flashed back to the terrified expression on Merlin’s face. He never wanted to see that expression put on the servant’s face by enemies, let alone himself. 

Arthur came to a conclusion. 

______________________________________________________________________________

Merlin had cried himself to sleep. And when he awoke the next morning, his body was sore. Arthur was going to execute him. Not that it shocked him. The king had been brought up hating magic. Merlin felt comfortably numb to the fact that he was going to die today. 

Footsteps came rushing into the dungeons. It was much too dark to see who it was until they were right in front of the cell. Gwaine, Gaius, and Gwen stood in front of the warlock’s cell. 

“Merlin…” Gwen gasped. Merlin looked up. 

“Merlin! How could you be so stupid!” Gaius scolded. “I leave for a day and you get yourself caught!?” 

“I had to save Arthur…” Merlin spoke softly. “He was going to be killed. I couldn’t just sit back and watch Arthur and the entire council be killed. I can already barely live with the guilt of killing all those people that I’ve had to.” Merlin swallowed back tears. He was tired of being weak and crying like a girl. “And-” Merlin cut himself off, choking back tears. “And I’ll go with whatever Arthur decides because I understand. I understand that I’ve hurt him and nothing can change that. I’ve come to terms with it all.”

They watched as the warlock who always had hope lost it all. As he lost all light and gave up. Arthur hating him was the worst feeling ever. 

“Merlin…”

“Please...just...don’t.” Merlin leaned back against the wall. Feeling more hopeless than ever. Gwen and Gaius left, but Gwaine just couldn’t give it up. 

“Mate, how can you be okay with this?”

Merlin’s blue eyes met Gwaine’s brown ones. “You think I’m okay with all this…?” 

“No, of course not! If Princess doesn’t see sense, I’ll beat it into him.”

“No. You won’t.”

“My loyalty is first and foremost to you.”

“Then, you’ll do as I say and protect him if he so chooses to execute me...Even if I’ve done a lot for him..”

Gwaine looked heartbroken. “I can’t let him do that...Merlin, mate, you’re too important,” Gwaine said defeatedly. 

"Gwaine." Merlin's tone said all he needed to say. And Gwaine was gone too. 

Merlin was left alone once more. 

It was some odd number of hours later before anyone else came in. This time, Merlin knew just by the foot-falls. Arthur was coming towards his cell. Merlin instantly braced himself for his judgment. Unlock it.” came the cool voice of Arthur. he heard as the cell was unlocked. Arthur stepped in. Merlin stared up at him. The warlock was shocked when, instead of yelling, Arthur held his hand out. Merlin hesitantly took it. “I am sorry that I did not give you a chance to explain yourself,” Arthur spoke gently as he helped Merlin up. 

The young Warlock followed the king on his orders to the throne room, where Gwen, Gwaine, Gaius, Elyan, Leon, and Percival sat. “I-I’m not sure I understand what’s happening…” Merlin said quietly. 

“Come on,  _ Mer _ lin. Are you that daft?” 

Merlin frowned. “I-”

“Just sit down Merlin,” Gwen said gently. 

Merlin felt a small bout of panic coming on. Though he was unsure of what caused it. Maybe it was their calm tones. Maybe it was the fact that he truly thought he was going to die. 

Merlin sat down wearily, though he trusted these people with his life...he didn’t trust them right now. They all, other than Gaius, were brought up hating magic. “Why don’t you start from the beginning, Merlin?”

“Beginning of what?”

“When you started practicing magic,” Arthur said outright. Merlin held back a flinch. So that’s what this is. They are going to question him and then send him to his death. “Well...it started when I was born.”

“That’s impossible. Arthur said incredulously. 

“No, Sire. While it is extremely rare, a warlock is born with their powers, however, in most cases, they don’t develop these powers until their teen years. Merlin has been doing magic since he was born.”

“It’s basically instinctual magic,” Merlin added. 

"Why did you move to Camelot?" Arthur questioned.

"My powers were getting too out of control. My mother was afraid something bad would happen so she sent me to Gaius so he could help me control my powers."

"What all have you done?" Gwaine asked. And at Merlin’s confused expression, he elaborated. “Earlier, you said that you’d done a lot for Princess.”

Merlin started, going on and on about how much he’d done. How many times he’s saved them. He moved on into the stories of how Lancelot knew about his magic. 

It wasn’t until he got to how many people have either died by his hands directly or indirectly, that the dark-haired warlock did start crying. The immense guilt and pressure haphazardly thrown onto his shoulders was weighing him down. He was beginning to crack under the pressure. What if, when he told them, they would see him differently. Not as a friend, but a murderer. 

“I-” Merlin cut himself off. Choking back a sob. “I’ve killed people. I have blood on my hands.” Merlin took a shaky breath. Now, the young warlock seemed lost in his own thoughts. His blue eyes, red from crying. His face stricken with grief and fear. “And I have this ridiculous destiny...how could one man do all the things I’ve had to do.”

Merlin began talking of his destiny. Of the Once and Future King and Emrys. "I'm also a dragonlord…" Merlin mumbled almost silently. 

"That's...you can't be. Balinor was the last dragonlord," Arthur said.

"A dragonlord's powers are passed from father to son upon death of the father," Gaius informed. 

Arthur's face broke out in realization. "Balinor...he was your father? But you told me you didn't know your father!" Arthur yelled. Though, despite the fact that it was not in anger. More in shock. Merlin flinched. 

"Gaius only just told me before we left to find him." 

"God...and I told you no man was worth your tears…"

"You what?! You insensitive-" 

"It's alright Gwaine. He didn't know." Merlin looked at his hands, a sad expression donned his delicate features. “Besides, I’ve long since forgiven him.” 

Arthur was shocked. How could he have been so stupid? He had found it odd that Merlin would cry over someone he’d just met. Their lives had been at stake many times before. Despite the fact that Merlin had been the most emotional person Arthur had known.

Arthur's mind was in jumbles. There were a few clear thoughts. 

_ Magic is evil.  _

_ Merlin has magic.  _

_ Merlin is not evil.  _

_ Magic can't be evil if Merlin has it...right? _

"Merlin, I-"

"No. Please don’t apologize. You’re already forgiven for everything. Someone once told me that a half cannot truly hate that which makes it a whole.” Merlin’s tone was soft. He seemed to be pondering something. “Please don’t hate me for what I’m about to say next…”

Arthur gave a confused glance and Merlin continued. “I released the Great Dragon,” Merlin said hesitantly. Realization donned on the king before it melted into anger. 

“You what?!” he yelled. Merlin visibly flinched at the tone. “How could you put the lives of the people at stake!?”

“I-”

“Save your petty excuses.”

“Arthur!” Gwen yelled. 

“I-” Merlin cut himself off. Trembling with fear at the blonde’s anger. “I had to…” he mumbled. 

If Merlin hadn’t been scared before, he was deathly afraid now. He felt his chest beginning to constrict again with the oncoming panic. He felt as if he was unable to draw in any air. 

Gwaine glared. Not at Merlin, but at Arthur. “You promised you would listen and not get mad at him,” he growled out. “Merlin deserves a chance to explain himself.”

Merlin’s lip trembled and his eyes were glassy with unshed tears. Arthur looked at Merlin, who was currently being comforted by Gaius. He remembered how terrified he’d been when he thought Merlin was going to die. He then pondered over what Merlin said. ‘A half cannot truly hate that which makes it a whole’. He looked deep within himself and found that Merlin was right. Arthur couldn’t hate him. He could be upset. Angry even. But he couldn’t bring himself to hate the bumbling, carefree, kind-souled man sitting in front of him. 

“Alright. I deeply apologize for my burst of anger.”

After a moment, Merlin continued. 

“The erm….Kilgharrah, well. We made a deal...basically I guess. If he gave me the information I wanted, acting as a guide where Gaius could not, then I’d free him. I owed him that much. Because...I mean...it can’t have been nice being chained up for so long. And his kin were slaughtered. Wouldn’t you seek even just a little bit of revenge if you were chained up for over twenty years?” Merlin spoke hesitantly. Almost as if he were afraid of what they would think. 

Merlin looked into each of their faces. They all held a mixture of shock and disbelief, almost. Except for Gaius who already knew all of this. Merlin felt every bit the monster that he was pretty sure they thought him as. Who other than a cold-hearted monster would release a dragon hell-bent on revenge and kill their kin and others just to keep one man safe? 

If they don’t accept him...he might as well die. He’s useless without his magic and he’s nothing without his destiny. 

“What about the bastet?” Arthur wondered out loud. “Did you have a hand in killing it?” 

Even though he had come to terms with Freya’s death, it was still a sore topic. “Her name was Freya, she was a druid girl trapped by Halig...and she was cursed to kill forevermore.” Merlin looked at his hands. Something he’d done quite a lot since they arrived in the throne room. 

“What happened to her?” 

“She died.” Merlin began to laugh. “We were going to run away together. I had only known her a short while…” Merlin sniffed. 

“How’d she die?” Gwaine asked obliviously. 

“She was hit while in bastet form...and when she turned back human, her body couldn’t handle it,” Merlin said. “Moving on, please.”

It took a while, but Merlin finally finished telling them all he’d done since arriving in Camelot. 

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry that you had to do all that alone and I’m sorry that I have been unsupportive. You’re my best friend, Merlin and I couldn’t ask for anything more,” Arthur spoke truthfully. His eyes held an emotion that Merlin couldn’t place. 

“It’s alright. Really. I understand that you were hurt. I lied to you and those actions had consequences.”

“I shouldn’t have let my anger rule. For that, old friend, I am sorry.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ..............ANOTHER CLIFFHANGER!!!
> 
> I do hope you enjoyed this chapter. I wrote it during a really tough time, hence all the angst....PLEASE let me know what you thought! I love love LOVE constructive criticism.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GUYS!!! I FINALLY GOT THE TIME TO FINISH!!! ALSO SEE THE BOTTOM FOR MORE NOTES. I don't want to spoil anythingg. **Wink wink**

Apologies were made. Best friends, fallen apart by lies, secrets, hurt feelings, and anger slowly began building themselves up again. Earning each other's trust. They almost bounced back to their original selves instantly, but there were a few times where it seemed like they weren't going to bounce back. 

Merlin stood beside Arthur in front of the crowd. “Lord Merlin Emrys,” A genuinely happy smile broke out on his face. 

Merlin couldn't be happier. He was now the court warlock, he was Arthur's first advisor-second to the queen of course- but just a close second. They were inseparable. Their brotherly bond brought to unbreakable lengths. 

They celebrated the new Camelot and things went back to normal. 

However, one day, Gaius fell ill. In his old age, there was nothing Merlin could do. The warlock did everything he could. “Merlin. My boy, don’t worry about me,” Gaius spoke softly. “Everything will be okay.” 

Merlin looked at his mentor with sad eyes. He knew that Gaius’ time was near...but he didn’t want to face reality. Tears began to spring freely from his eyes. It was there, in the castle, surrounded by the people that he loved, where he died. Merlin let loose the sobs he was holding back as his mentor took his last breaths. Merlin let go of Gaius’ hand and it fell limply by the physician’s side. He stood up abruptly, the chair he was sitting in falling over. 

He walked out of the room, unable to be in there any longer. 

Merlin sat on the wall of the castle, overlooking the courtyard. He took notice of the shift in the air as someone sat down beside him. 

"He's really gone...isn't he?" His voice was small, laced with exhaustion and sadness. Merlin held his face in his hands. 

Arthur stayed quiet, but placed a hand on Merlin’s shoulder and squeezed gently. Letting the warlock know that he was there for Merlin.

Merlin was grateful for the silence. He needed time to process his thoughts. 

Gaius’ funeral was one of the most lavish of them all. But this time, magic was involved. It took a while, but the people had grown to accept Merlin and those like him with uncanny talents.

The emotional trauma, along with everything that has been happening surrounding Morgana has been a lot of the warlock’s mind. He was now sitting with the knights, along with Guinevere and Arthur. The atmosphere in the room was tense. 

“You mean to tell me that Morgana is on her way here? To Camelot?”

“Yes Sire,” Said Sir Leon. 

“How long?” 

“I put the timeline at about four days.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I'm definitely going to be continuing this in a sequel. YAYYYY
> 
> I've grown super attached to this idea and I'm not ready to let it go yet. So it's SEQUEL TIMEEEE!!! Might make it longer than four chapters, but I'm not sure. I really hope you guys are as excited as I am. **Great big grin***

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading. I've been contemplating posting this because I felt like it wasn't very good. I really hope that you enjoyed reading! Merlin has been a wild ride and I really hated the ending of the show...it made me so sad and it felt...unfinished. 
> 
> I am very insecure about my work, but I've been told it's good...so I'll just leave this here. **Backs away slowly and returns to dark corner**


End file.
